It is always a mixed blessing to find a self-addressed stamped envelope in the mailbox. To see my own handwritings staring back at me amongst the pile of bills and solicitations is at first perplexing why would I send something to myself, and then quickly, oh, right, a submission response. Then I take a deep breath and I contemplate timing, How long will I wait until I open it? Now? Here in the driveway in the the sunlight? After I am in the house? Later today? Not at all?
When the first SASEs started coming in, I would rip them open as soon as I realized what they were. That didn't last long, cause who wants to open something that the odds say will carry news they don't want to hear? In fact the only written acceptance I have received, thus far, has been via email. In general, I wait until I am in the house, in the kitchen where I can put the rest of the pile down temporarily, before I rip open my once pristine envelope.
I stated earlier that an SASE is a mixed blessing. Even if it contains a rejection, or in this week's case a list of winners that doesn't include me, the up side is that it frees that particular essay up for submitting to another publication or contest. Then it no longer stagnates on my record of submissions list.
To make a long story short (too late), I did not win this year's Crab Orchard Review Literary Award in creative nonfiction. I had entered my favorite essay to date, Beautiful Damage.
So as of today, I have 3 submissions out.
