Word Counts or Words Count

I have written over 2100 words this week. This does not include anything academically work related. All 2146 words are for creative works. This does not include blog postings, which I also consider to be creative works, so the count is actually much higher.

I also wrote a 100 word essay and submitted it for publication. It has been accepted and will be published in the (hopefully near) future. I will post when I have the specifics.

I don't yet consider myself un-blocked, but definitely can see some sunlight up ahead and have hopes that I will emerge from this dark tunnel soon.

Breathing and writing both feel a bit easier this week.

A Little Inspiration

A student in my Thursday evening class has a tattoo on his hand. He is certainly not alone; nearly all his classmates sport some sort of inked skin. His tattoo, and the attitude that comes with it, has finally pushed me passed my disdain for what I have often considered to be a symbol of white trash, drunken irresponsible behavior. I am actually inspired by his tattoo: Believe.

In addition to the permanent reminder that he should always believe in himself, his choices, and his forward life momentum, he carries small cards with him everywhere, in his car, as bookmarks, in his binder/notebook, in his pocket. They follow the simplicity of his tattoo: Believe.

I find this inspiring, so much so that I was able to temporarily work around my writer's block to produce a short short essay about him for the Fine Line E-Book call for submissions. In just under 100 words, I told the briefest of stories about how he has inspired me.

THEN, I dusted off a long-shelved essay and submitted it to The Kiss anthology. No new writing on this one, but I feel that the publication would be a very good fit for this essay aptly entitled "It Started With a Kiss and Ended in Silence."

THEN some of my writerly friends got fired up about forming a new writing group that includes me. I am so overwhelmed by the most recent gestures that I can't think about them/the group without crying. I should be able to get beyond that within a few days.

A little inspiration can go a long way. It helps the breathing AND the writing.

Two years and seven months later

I received an email rejection for a short essay I wrote about traveling. I submitted the essay in March 2010. More than 2 1/2 years later, the publishers finally decided to let me know they wouldn't be using my story.

BLOCKED

Ugh!

I have managed to block myself away from writing.

I have some theories as to how and why, but not a lot of luck in working through far enough to really write more than a few sentences.

I haven't even managed to blog.

Ugh!

But technically this is a blog post.

Okay.

Writing.

Not work related writing. Not writing assignments or email to students. Not lesson planning.

Writing.

I'm writing.

Ugh!

Imaginary Obstacles

All week I have been thinking about a book project I put down a few years ago. I was wondering, yet again, what the best approach to telling this particular story should be. I have recently been in the building where important events of the story took place. I began to write a bit in my head about visiting the site of a murder. I even thought of some new things to write about. Maybe it is time to revisit this concept; the last time I seriously looked at it was back when I attended the Napa Valley Writer's Conference during the summer of 2010. The story I want to write about is true, but I am afraid that it will hurt the survivors, so someone suggested that I fictionalize it.

It feels like it is time to move the obstacles out of the way. I may not be able to get completely around all of them at this time, but I am feeling as if I need to revisit the idea.

So today I opened the long unused files; thankfully they survived the hard drive crash from last Fall because I back up pretty regularly. I opened the most recent version of the book proposal and found quite a bit of information I had forgotten.

I knew that I had done some writing. I knew that I had done a decent amount of research, but I had not yet made my way to the county courthouse where presumably there sits a treasure trove of vital information. I was thinking that it is time to figure out how to map out the story so that I can move forward with the project.

What I found was summaries of 15 chapters!!! I have already done so much work on this project! Zounds! I have already organized the story and built the table of contents.

I think I have found my summer project. I am teaching in the middle of the day M-Th this summer, but it is only one class and I will have time to breath, maybe even time to research and write. Whooppeee!

When I really examine the obstacles in my way, realize that they are mostly imaginary. Nothing is so large that I can't write my way around it. This could be a really good summer.

Oh, never mind

"Scent Memories" is not actually going to be published right now. The lit journal that accepted it has gone on an extended hiatus. Blah. Back to the submission board.

Burning Out the Old (again)

As is our family tradition, last night was spent with a small gathering at home. We used the last hour or so of 2011 to burn out old issues from the year and manifest new energies for the new year. Sitting around the fire pit, each of us wrote on a piece of wood (or two) and tossed the fuel into the already roaring flames.

Several months ago I was feeling distracted and burdened by a box of rejection letters I had sitting on a shelf in my office. I queried suggestions on FB for dealing with them and decided that burning them at end of the year sounded like the most satisfying.

There were several years when the letters were a representation that I am, in fact, a writer because I had written enough to send pieces out for possible publication and been rejected. There were several rejections for one essay that is about to be released in an anthology. Realizing that this one particular essay had to be turned away before it was ultimately accepted felt pretty good.

I kept a few letters out of the burn pile because they had specific remarks or feedback that were complimentary or that I wasn't sure I had recorded in electronic version. I keep a record of where and when I send writing out and what the basic responses were. This way of course I don't resend the same piece out redundantly.

After watching the papers burn it occurred to me that even if I missed a couple of nice words, there is simply no need to keep anything negative around. I don't need rejections to prove I am a writer. I no longer feel the need for that particular badge of honor.

So I tossed the rest in and watched them release the last of the negative energy that I know will ultimately be reabsorbed into life in general and redistributed into something more productive.